Starting Over...

Hello hello my dear readers. And so it has began... and I can hardly move my arms to type this due to HARDCORE working out! :) Yesterday my husband and I weighed in with some new freinds to start off a Spring weight-loss/ lifestyle change contest. Can I tell you a secret? I think I might have punched the scale. I mean... it had to be off right? There's NO WAY I'm back at where I started again. Just no way.

Well, alas it is the sad truth. I have to start over. I know some of you are probably thinking, "eh... no biggie, you know you can do it."

While other's are probably thinking, "YOU IDIOT! How could you do that to yourself again?!!!"

And then there are those who are with me in thinking, "HOLY CRAP BATMAN. I have to do THAT all over again??!" Boy am I in for a ride. *insert face palm here*

Last year I got down to 234.

Right now I'm at *cough* (I will divulge in a week... lets just say I AM starting over.)

And lets add that HOODIES are NOT my friend right now...

My husband is coming along for the ride this time too!

This makes me happy since I am the one that kept bringing home the junk for him

to eat right along with me. :( Poor guy!

 This is where I used to be:

But this is where I want to be (a little more rounded out and soft, just like

the hubs likes it! haha!)

And this is where Josh and I will be together at the end of this!:

I love my family. I adore my children. And I love my new home. With all of that I still fight the war against over-eating. I scoff at people who try to tell me how to fight it... when they have never been there themselves. It is a fight I will have for the rest of my life. But I want to have that life... and so I will sacrifice this year of yummy pleasure eating to a torment of hell in the gym and nasty tasting food that will kill the taste buds, so that my children will have a mom AND dad as they grow. (Whew! That was a terrible run-on sentence, wasn't it?)Because... aren't  my children worth it?

Wasn't she worth all the weight in the World?

...And aren't Josh and I worth it?

I would like to think so...

So come along for the ride because it is going to be a rough one full of silly moments and terrible disappointments. It will also be full of triumph and friendships that are tested...  and I can use ALL the encouragement that is out there.

Because aren't we all beautiful? 

It's Been... Awhile!

Hello hello everyone! Today I am 39 and 5 days pregnant! You know what that means, right? Baby Lyndi will be here ANY day now and I just wanted to leave a quick update about how I've been doing.

Well...

Not so great weight wise! But that's okay. I am not going to allow myself to feel guilty or to beat myself up over this pregnancy's weight gain. I am resigned to the fact that me and pregnancy are not friends and this has been a pretty intense year for me. So- weight gain was inevitable. The new question is... WHAT am I going to do about it now?

As soon as I have my baby girl and get cleared I am on a new mission. Same idea, just some new motivation.

I hope you all come back to help support me along the way, and I hope I can inspire any other new mommies to join me too! :)

Because remember... WE ARE ALL BEAUTIFUL! *Even if we are the size of a beached whale at nearly 10 months pregnant! haha!

An Eye Rolling Revelation!...

As many of you know (but many still don't!) I have an announcement to make...

I'm....

Not diabetic! HAHAHA! :)

Okay- so honestly I'm pregnant with my third baby. Yay! ...BUUUUT this definitely will put my weight "LOSS" on hold for awhile... but not stop me from being the healthiest me I can be and make this pregnancy the best I have had yet. This is the fittest I have been pregnant and I intend to stay as active as possible. Now you know why I am in the pelvic floor class, eh? HAHA! Honestly though as soon as I create a plan with my doctor on how to manage my weight and the developing baby I will be able to share it with you.

That said I did find out this morning that I am NOT diabetic. After my car accident my urinalysis registered sugar in my urine and my walk-in doctor was adamant that I had diabetes and needed to be tested immediately. Being the stubborn mule that I am, I passively refused by never showing up. I just never went in. How would I have developed diabetes AFTER losing a lot of weight- but not while I was the heaviest I have ever been? It boggled me and I decided he was full of pooh.

Now don't get me wrong, I do respect doctors greatly and I appreciate their concern for their patients, but since having my daughter I have kind of learned to call their bluffs. Most doctors are soo worried about being held liable or be sued they'd rather scare the living snot out of you even if the indicator is so small and minute. My philosophy? THINK BEFORE SPEAKING. I was JUST in a serious car accident... could it be possible there was sugar in my urine because of stress???

Anyway- so all my ranting aside, when I was at my first OB appointment yesterday they MADE me take this test because heaven forbid I go into this pregnancy blind. (Crazy stubborn Nichole...) And this morning I looked online and guess what- HEALTHY AS AN OX! Nothing unusual about me other than pregnant. And the only reason this is unusual is because we have NO idea how far along I am... was I pregnant before the accident? Or afterward??? According to the records I would have gotten pregnant the day OF the accident- NOT LIKELY... :P So in a week, July 2nd, I find out everything that has been running around confusing me in my brain and I can't wait.

Here's to being healthy and trying to remain that way!!! An d I wish all you luck in your journey's to becoming a better you too!

Pelvic Floor Workouts

Did you know that there is more to working out your pelvic floor? Apparently "kegels" aren't the only way to strengthen all those little muscles down there. I've been going to a pelvic floor class and have been doing more squats than I ever would have thought imaginable. My knees and quads are rock solid! :)

Have you ever thrown up and pee'd yourself? Or how about laughed uncontrollably to only have to run to the bathroom and clean up after yourself?

Well I have done both things and have already seen a huge difference by taking this class.

So here I am telling all of you women (and yes MEN!) that you can fix all those little problems (that having children completely destroys in you) by just engaging in squats and lunges. If you are interested in any of these e-mail me at isnt_she_beautiful@hotmail.com and I will send you the power-point with step by step instructions on how to do specific squats that specifically target pelvic floor muscles.

Because it really isn't normal to pee while jogging... ha!

A Little Bit Sassy...

Through all the drama something wonderfully exciting may be happening to my husband and I. We shall see though. In the meantime I was starting to feel pretty "mommy'ish" and had a friend say I should spice it up a bit. Being a natural blonde I have always played with the idea of going darker... but too nervous it would look too goth. Not really the look I'd like to portray myself. And since I am going to a concert at the end of this month and have done a pretty good job with my exercising decided it was time to... rebel. :)

The picture below was taken exactly a year ago...

This is from two nights ago.

Not only am I darker but also 30+ pounds lighter... :)

This makes me happy!

... And feel a little bit sassy!

Hi. My name is Nichole... and I'm a...

Hi! My name is Nichole and I am a choc-a-holic {slash} mental case {slash} unusually hilarious {slash} drama queen!

I thought I should lay that all out there just in case you hadn't caught on to my personality yet. :)

For real though, what do you think has been helping me survive this INSANE time of my life right now? Unfortunately it has been chocolate. Not just any ol' chocolate bar though. Nope. It's the Godiva chocolate cheesecake at the Cheesecake Factory. It's the chocolate Butterfinger ice cream bars. It's the new strawberry lemonade slushy at McDonald's. Wait... that's not chocolate is it?

Well you're getting the picture of my new dillema.

I have gone from a very HEALTH conscious working out machine to an injured sugar craving mommy monster.

THIS HAS GOT TO STOP!!!

Physical therapy started last week, as did massage therapy. At first I was so excited about these steps leading up to recovery. I had dreamed of luxurious spa like treatment, nice oily rub downs, easy assisted stretching and light work outs.

WHAT WORLD AM I FROM???

Someone had once told me that physical therapists are commonly referred to as physical terrorists. THIS IS TRUE. Apparently you aren't supposed to baby an injury- in my case an injured neck/ right shoulder/ arm. My entire posture has caved in on itself and I am the female version of Quasimodo. It's pretty attractive if I don't say so myself. My physical terrorist... err therapists don't seem to agree. Instead they stretch,

pull, and tug on my arm trying to get my shoulder blade to work the way it's supposed to. I'm not usually so chipper when this is actually happening. :)

Now to the massages. Long, oily rub downs... THEY ARE NOT! Do you know what a trigger point is? Well, everyone has them in different parts of their bodies and especially in injuries. For those of you who have never heard of a trigger point (this was me before the accident), let me explain briefly. They're "knots" in your muscles and tendons. I don't really know anything more medical then that though.

When you go in for a massage for medical reasons- they are not luxurious. Well, that's a lie. They start out luxurious. The massage therapist works his magic rubbing over your back making you believe you are in the ocean and waves are riding across your back. Then he attacks. He finds ALL of your trigger points and PINCHES them until tears come into your eyes.

Now don't get me wrong. I am supposed to say "mercy" when it gets too tough for me; however I have been told many times I don't have a high pain tolerance so I bite my cheeks and close my eyes as TIGHT as I can with out folding my face in on itself. And if you are curious where my trigger points are let me elaborate: my entire Trapezious (sp?) muscle starting from the bottom of my head down past my shoulder blades and up and over my collar bone. That's my back side. My front side? Yup- I have them there too. Awkward much? lol! Right above my right breast all the way up into my collar bone and then into my right arm pit.

Can you imagine having someone PINCH and SQUISH your muscles right there??? IT HURTS!

But complaining aside, these things have REALLY loosened me up and taken away the whip lash migraines. That alone makes my torture sessions WORTH IT! One of my physical therapists even mentioned that my posture is starting to get better. Phew!

Now I haven't been sitting idly by eating my chocolate ice cream bars and reading book after book {cough}, I have also started going on LONG walks with my children in their strollers again. It feels SO nice. I haven't had ANY weight gain and in fact have been complemented that my face is starting thin out again!

WOOT! WOOT!!

I still go to my Monday night Ab Ninja class and leave feeling very wobbly and sore. I'm very careful with my arm, but as of last Monday actually had enough strength in my arm to do some ab workouts involving a medicine ball.

Because triathlon training has been completely TORN from work out regimen I am going to start training for a 5K. With the help of all those around me I think I can really do this. :) I have to believe that so I can stay optimistic and continue this journey with out too many set backs. The Moses Lake Triathlon is this weekend and my heart is sad that I don't get to compete, but I know that there is a bigger picture out there for me. I just have to wait and see what it is.

I hope all of you have a safe Memorial Day weekend and watch out for those teenage girls with five or ten piercings in their faces- they'll get you when you least expect it! HAHA! {No offense to anyone personally!}

Love Nichole!

Where Did I Go?...

I bet you're wondering what the heck has happened to Ms. Nichole, hmm? Well let me tell you! One HOUR after I mailed in my registration form to participate as a relay during my first Triathlon I got hit head on in my car. (Which we had only had for two months!)

Doesn't life sometimes leave you wondering, " WHAT THE HECK?!!!"

So through many phone calls and lots of stressing out, and yes even some injuries later I got an e-mail stating that my check has been shredded for the triathlon.

So here I am, left to wonder what the heck do I do now? I am so tired of all these CRAZY obstacles that continue to pop up in my road to a happier and healthier life. Not only did we have to FIGHT for them to NOT total out the car, I have to wait for all my injuries to heal. And then there is the frustration of the other party that caused the accident in the first place... but we'll let that one alone for now.

And still, after all my ranting I'm in the same spot. Where do I go from here? I guess time will only tell. At least my beautiful children are okay and my injuries are ones I can live with. Because although I am truly FRUSTRATED with this situation; I KNOW that there is a plan out there for me and that I need to just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Love Nichole

^ Before

v After

I'm going in tomorrow to get my referral's for physical therapy and massage on my right arm and neck. I'm kind of looking forward to that personally... I've had a whip-lash migraine since the accident. Wish me luck!