Week 9 Weigh-in... And Some Sick Lovin'

Today marks my 9th week weigh-in. Wow! Have I really been working on this that long already? That's incredible. I can honestly say I don't think I've ever worked so hard on anything! Just the thought of it breaks me into a nasty sweat.

You'd think I'd be used to that now ... sweating that is. But no- and I hope I don't ever get used to the feeling of nasty salty sweat dripping off my forehead. Or turning purple from exertion. I look like a one eyed, one horned, flying purple people eater... And honestly I probably look as if I COULD eat a person. It's pretty hott. Not gonna lie. :)

So back to my "weigh-in!" This week I've lost a little under 3 pounds! Yay me! I haven't done this well since my first week. The trick? Cardio. It HAS to be. The last couple of weeks I've actually started to slack and find every excuse after another about why I couldn't go to our nasty little gym. Yes. It's nasty. Once I was on the treadmill and it jumped from 3.0 mph to 6.0 MPH! I went from walking casually to running for my life! It was if the treadmill got scared and jumped into high gear. It was probably thinking, "C'MON FATTY! Either ship up or ship out!" And apparently it was going to just go ahead and ship me out with out consultation.

I can honestly say it scared the bird crap out of me and I thought I was going to fly off the stupid thing and hit my big ol' butt against the wall behind me. The part that scared me wasn't the falling, oh no! It was the fact that I don't think the wall would have stopped me. I would have slid right on through and attempted home base in the middle of the street. (Probably just as some short school bus pulled out onto the road. Wouldn't THAT just be my luck?)

But to no avail I survived, as did the wall behind me. And I have started going back into the gym... I just stay clear of the possessed treadmill that hates me. (Need I remind you Mr. Treadmill, the hatred IS mutual! :) I've stuck to the stationary bicycles and the old school eliptical. They suck but they're obviously doing the trick.

Now I don't work out hardcore or anything. I am still 80 pounds over weight and fear if I work too hard my heart will EXPLODE out of my heaving bosom. (Did I really just say that?) Here's an example from one of my workouts this week:

I rode on the stationary bike for 10 minutes. The first minute was just a natural pace to warm up my muscles. The next minute (and every other minute there after) I made the setting extremely hard (scale 1-16. 16 being the hardest) and put it at 11 and then the next minute moved it down to either 7 or 8 and rode like the wind. The point for me was to get my heart rate up and work my leg muscles all the same. I did this on and off for the entire 10 mintues. Then for the second part of my work out I walked/ speed walked on the eliptical. So I keep my cardio workouts at about 20 minutes right now, but once I've built up my strength I'll be a biking/ running machine. I will however wear appropriate clothing as opposed to what these two wonderfully free women are demonstrating here.

***************

Food:

Real quick! I've been getting sick, and Dan told me that I really need to try to avoid this because I'll crave SUGAR like crazy. Yup. He was right. I crave EVERYTHING. It's been hard staying away from all the tempting little cookies out there taunting me with there chocolatey chip goodness. I need ideas on how to get past these cravings.

Any ideas?

Also- We're traveling this weekend so I won't be posting my measurements until later or maybe I'll have to wait until next weekend. But! I do need some idea's about what I can do for travel snacks considering it's an 8 hour drive round trip.


Until then- don't do anything this guy would do!

And have a safe Memorial Day weekend! (:

Dear Nichole...

*Some may find the style I wrote this a little odd ... however the reasons I did go this route are personal. If you choose to continue I hope you enjoy.

Dear Nichole,

I recognized you in the mirror today. It's been awhile my friend since I've seen your smiling face. I noticed your glasses looked a little big on you. What a wonderful problem to have. Nichole, I also saw you were wearing jeans today. It's been awhile hasn't it friend? Weren't those the jeans you bought after you lost 20 lbs. after having Aiden? No? Close though, right?

I'm very proud of you Nichole. You're achievements have been huge and you've worked so hard. Please remember this is just the beginning of the journey, but you're learning skills you will be able to carry with you forever. Soon, my friend, you'll be you again.

I've noticed things about you in the mirror, Nichole, when you smiled at me. You've grown. I can see that you are now a mother. What a wonderful role to play. I also noticed you are softer now, calmer. You look happy. I'm so happy for you. You're hair is long again, and you have tiny wrinkles that play around the corner of your eyes. Is it from smiling? I hope you're smiling a lot Nichole. You have every reason to.

Dear Nichole please know you are a daughter of god. That he made you perfect in every way and that you are beautiful. Life is hard and we are all given challenges to help us grow as individuals, mother's, daughter's, sister's, wives, and friends. Take this goal you've made for yourself and help other's with it. Help other's to learn that no matter their appearance they are so very perfect too! Please help all those other women to know that they can do anything they set their hearts on. Help them to love them.

I hope you learn to love me Nichole, because I love you. I hope I see you again soon... and I hope I see you smiling.

Love me- you're reflection.

Week 8 Weigh-In

Okay I wasn't sure WHAT my numbers would be this week and I was pretty nervous when I saw that I was only ONE ounce away from two pounds. ONE WHOLE OUNCE? REALLY? So... like most desperate house wives searching for that little piece of extra umpf, I worked it.

I spit in the sink for 30 minutes. (My husband's idea- not mine!)

I went to the bathroom a total of five times in an hour.

I nursed my daughter twice! YES- that's twice on each side in THAT hour. Ha! Beat that La Leche!

... and the most embarrassing confession:

I did jumping jacks in the nude for five minutes.
(No this picture isn't of me... and please don't be offended if your large and reading this because remember- I'm large too!)

But to no avail, I didn't lose that one ounce.

Do not despair, however, because although I didn't lose my goal of two pounds I still lost one pound and gained a pound of muscle which leaves me at two pounds of fat lost this week! Yay me! **Patting myself on my back!**

So here we go, my official numbers for week eight.

Neck: 14.25 (lost .25 inches!) Started at 15.5 inches

Chest: 46.5 (gained .5 inches because I needed to nurse Shaylee...) Started at 49.0 inches

Upper Arm: 13.5 (lost .25 inches) Started at 15.0 inches

Lower Arm: 10.5 (stayed the same) Started at 11.0 inches

Upper Waist: 39.0 (lost .25 inches) Started at 42 inches

Lower Waist: 42.75 (lost .25 inches) Started at 46.5 inches

Hips: 49.0 (lost .75 inches!) Started at 52.25 inches

Thigh: 24.0 (Stayed the same- gained muscle here.) Started at 26.0 inches

Calf: 17.0 (Also stayed the same due to musle gain.) Started at 17.5 inches

So I actually had a pretty good week, especially after my great results last week!

Weight: 253.0 lbs. Total Fat Lost: 22 lbs. Total Weight Lost: 16 lbs.

Total Muscle Gain: 6 lbs.

*Awesome fact(s) from this weeks weight loss:

-I fit in my prepreg Shaylee clothing from almost 2 years ago!

-I wore my pea-coat from when I was 19 to church today. You know that movie, Tommy Boy? YUP- I was a "Fat man in a little coat!"

Friday Night Raving...

I've decided to use an idea most of my friends do on their blogs... and maybe complain/ list some things that I've noticed or am looking forward to. Enjoy!

- I can't wait till I can roller blade again... and not break my wrist when I fall on my fat WHA WHA?!

- I can't wait until I can rock climb again... and not snap the wire only 3 feet up.

- I can't wait until I can rock climb AGAIN... and actually pull myself up on the rope!

- I hate eggs. They smell like farts- therefore I smell like farts. Not so attractive.

- I hate yams. Enough said.

- Yoga is fun- If you're a snake.

........or Jillian Michaels.

- I hate skinny people. Amen.

- Why can't I count chasing my 2 year old as cardio-exercise? My heart-rate raises and I can't speak normally.

- Am I losing calories just typing this? Probably not... I am afterall sedentary!

- WHO CREATED THE CATEGORIES THAT DETERMINE WHAT ACTIVITY LEVEL YOU ARE AT? Just curious... cause if THIS is sedentary... then I'm dead before I ever reach mediocre!

- Recently learned that I lost 400 calories on my 4 hour walk. ONLY 400 CALORIES???? Shoot.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...

- Tomorrow is my weigh-in ... If I don't do well then I promise hairy legs for church on Sunday.

...... And as I side note for me to remember tomorrow. (And please don't be offended by this because I'm not referring to anyone in particular, and I realize that every person is different ...)

*Just because some people tend to lose more weight than I in a shorter amount of time doesn't mean I'm doing a bad job. In fact, for me this is the best I have ever done with out throwing everything up (ie. pregnancy!). I may not be pulling in big numbers, but for me I am. I just need to stand tall and remember myself that no matter what- I am beautiful.

~Me

Just One of Those Days...

WEDNESDAY:

You know those days when the sun is out and it's amazingly beautiful outside. When you just don't feel like sitting on your couch watching the shadows crawl and shift across the lawn? Today was definitly one of those days. My workout today was to focus on my abs- but I just couldn't stay cooped up so Rachel and I walked to her daughters school, had a picnic, then walked to Wal-Mart. The best ghetto spot in the area!

It was quite the adventure I must say. We almost- ALMOST didn't make it home alive! Stupid stupid drivers! Once some stupid teenage boys didn't see me and my HUMONGOUS double stroller and almost ran into my babies pulling out of some fast food place. AND THEN Rachel's babies almost got hit by some MORON... you know who you are... who didn't want to stop to turn right. NEEDLESS TO SAY- I was hooting and hollering and definitly greatful for the filter I've worked so hard to instill within myself. What is it with people not realizing that if they HIT a couple of babies... they won't even get to their destination? If I don't pound their heads in first... then it's off in a patrol car they go!

Phew. Okay- had to get that off my chest. Now I feel better. :)

So anyway we continued on to a fruit stand and then went our separate ways. The entire walk added up to be 5.9 miles for me. HOLY MAN am I sore! My left hip is tight and starting to act up again so I need to make sure I stretch it so I don't start walking like I did just a few weeks ago!

Ps. I shook my tail feathers as the best I could, and yes- I looked like a hussy. But I can proudly say that my fanny aint lookin so granny-like!

Peace~

7 Week Weigh-In... TOTALLY WORTH IT!

Technically yesterday was supposed to be my official weigh-in, but life got in the way as it usually does. Today however was a super uber exciting day for me. If you don't remember, let me refresh you about last weeks weigh-in. IT WAS TERRIBLE. I was a huge soggy bag of dissappointed Nikki-Anni-Hanni. (Nichole Ann Hansen (maiden name)) I have to say though, something must have tickled my inspiration button because this week was FAB-U-LOUS!

Ok... here it goes! I realize it's a lot of information ... but look closely. I think you might be pleasantly surprised!

Was256
Now 254
This week I lost 3 lbs. and gained 1 back in muscle, leaving me at 2 lbs. lost for week 7.

85 more pounds to go!

Neck: 14.5 (I actually lost 1/8th of an inch but we didn't count it.) started at: 15.5
Chest: 46.0 (lost .5 in.) started at: 49.0
Upper Arm: 13.75 (lost .25 in.) started at: 15.0
Lower Arm: 10.5 (stayed the same...) started at: 11 in.
Upper Waist: 39.25 (lost .25 in.) started at: 42.0 in.
Lower Waist: 43.0 (lost .5 in.) started at: 46.5
Hips: 49.75 (lost .25 in.) started at: 52.25
Thigh: 24.0 (lost 1 ENTIRE INCH!) started at: 26.0
Calf: 17.0 (stayed the same...) started at: 17.5

*Note: Neck and lower arm are low in fat so numbers change very slowly.
*Note: Thigh and calf have both gained muscle during various other weeks... so results look better than sound. :)
*Note: MY ARMS HAVE MUSCLE NOW!! *WOOT WOOT!

INFACT- My arms are AS sexy as Madonna's, if not sexier! HA! No worries though... I'm still fat- so I'm kind of only sort of joking... hehehe!

So now I want to leave you with a wonderful image. Food for thought- so to speak. A reward if you will for reading my ENTIRE posting. ;) ....

Have you ever heard of the book, "Everybody Poops"? Well... I want you to realize that yes this will be awkward, and YES I can't believe I'm going to go there... but heck, here goes!

The more you eat, the faster your metabolism is...

THE MORE YOU POOP!

HAVE A GREAT LUNCH!

Wouldn't Know Mother's Day Was Sinful...

Mother's day was a horrible chocolate eating ordeal for one that's trying to lose weight! I was feeling pretty good around 11 in the morning sitting in Relief Society (women's church class in LDS religion) and then the bishopric comes walking in like jolly-old-St.- Nicholas! All three men had a basket full of goodies with huge grins. The first thing I thought was "OH NOOO!!!!" But OH YES- it was delightful! Once the chocolate filled basket reached me and Rachel I yell out, "This is SINFUL!" Needless to say I turned a crazy shade of purple as several other women ACROSS the room chuckled- probably thinking the same thing!

On top of my INCREDIBLY YUMMY Lindor Chocolate truffle candy bar Josh had made artery clogging, heart attacking uber gooey brownies with Orea cookie crumble and white chocolate drizzel. I know what you're thinking right now- I'm a sinner and need to repent to the fat burning gods. I apologize. HOWEVER! In my defense I only had a piece that was equivalent to a tablespoon! (No worries about the husbands feelings ... the truth is he actually made the brownies for his church class as a goodbye since he has recently been released as their teacher.)

So before I get condemned to a life of fat fortitude I should announce that this week was much better weight-wise. I weighed in at 2 lbs. less! I should also mention that last night was our Ward's (LDS term for the congregation attended based on living location and time) miniature golf tournament AND BAKE SALE! Rarr I say. Rarr. Curse you fat satan. But to no avial I only had TWO BITES of my Ande's mint covered chocolate brownie. OH THAT WAS A HEAVENLY FEW SECONDS! Then I demanded that Josh finish it! Josh surely enjoyed that punishment ... where as I just stared and SALIVATED the entire time his slow moving, slobber covered lips devoured that itty piece of heaven.

Anyway today is week 7 and my measurements are going to be tonight after a much needed massage that Josh paid for. You can call it my belated mother's day gift. So I'll post my results tomorrow.

Peace out my brothers and sisters, and as always remember... YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!

Love Nichole

Six Week Weigh-In

I'm super frustrated and angry and all those nasty words with myself right now. Today I walked up two huge hills TWICE. I also worked out with Dan at a park w/our families for about one hour. And then we had our weigh-in. Because of the workout/ walking I was retaining a lot of water ... also Dan explained that my muscles were full of blood and larger than normal. Needless to say it wasn't the best weigh-in.

So ... to clarify, I'm upset with my results not the workout. The workout was amazing. Infact I just got done soaking my feet in an epson salt foot bath. Now that was HEAVENLY!!! And to be honest, I can barely move!!! My hips and feet feel as if they are literally FALLING OFF my body! And that my friends is not an exageration. I got home and collapsed "oohing" and "ouching" on the way down to the comfort of our wonderfully cheap couch. Can you guess where I spent the rest of my evening? Yup- you got it. On the couch!

So- here are the results (and I'm pretty positive next week will be a ton better!):

EVERYTHING STAYED THE SAME!!! except for my thighs and calfs.
Thigh- lost another .5 in.
Calf- lost another .25 in.

I lost 1 pound leaving me at: 256
19 (+-) lbs. fat lost. 13 lbs. off my actual weight.
87 more pounds to go!


PS. I saw my reflection in the sliding glass window tonight and had to do a double take. My appearance is finally starting to change back for the better. YAY! I'm disappointed in myself for not putting in more work but know that next week is a new week and I can do better.

Love me

1 week= 1 pound & a lot of frustration!

Saturday. Time to weigh-in. Anticipation. Hopes. Fears ... and FRUSTRATION. This week I've lost 1 pound. I know, I know. I should be grateful that I lost another pound, right? But I'm not. I'm disappointed. I worked so hard and expected at least 2 pounds!

So here I am over-analyzing everthing I've done this week feeling all rotten and fat crazed. I know it's totally my fault too. I guess that's the worst part. The part that makes me want to spin out like a tasmanian devil and just eat a peice of chocolate truffle covered chocolate cake. OH YUM!

No worries though... I won't do that. Instead of sitting here in self-loathing I'll just wait for the rest of my results later in the day. I mean I DID LOSE 1 pound and didn't gain back. That's a plus. I've got to keep things in perspective. Not every week is going to be a good week ... AND I can't base my weight-loss plan off of anyone else because then I will be discouraged.

So- until later then. And hopefully I'll have something GREAT to tell.

~Me

Stairway to HADES!

Today I ran stairs.

"THUMP THUMP THUMP"

Heavy breathing.

"THUMP THUMP THUMP"

Heavier, labored breathing.

"THUMP THUMP THUMP"- SCREAM.... CRASH...

Heavy, blood-gurgling, labored breathing.

Okay- it wasn't quite THAT bad. But I must admit part of me yearned for me to miss a step just so I wouldn't have to complete my 3 flights of stairs 10 times. Towards the end of my running experience through HADES (dark underworld in Greek? mythology) I truly felt as if my lungs were screaming and my stomach was revulting against everything I had ingested this morning- and I still had 9 more flights to go. When I was done I ran my shaky and wobbly booty into the apartment and pleaded with my cubboard to "please, very please" let there be a clean cup inside. Woohoo! I hollared to my friend Rachel as I grabbed a huge crazy goblet out and snarfed down the water from the tap.

Have you ever had a HUGE glass of freezing cold water after a hard workout? It feels OH-SO-GOOD on the way down... and then you feel a little ...sick. I guess next time I'll just have to be a little more careful on my water intake as well as the temperature of the water. I guess warm gatorade it'll have to be. *GAG*

When I was done with my stairs I then proceeded on with my leg workouts, which included: lunges, squats, CRAZY SCARY hanging squats, calf raises (HOLY HANNAH those hurt!) and everything else you could possibly think of.

IF I DON'T HAVE AMAZING AWESOME LEGS BY THE END OF THIS... I'LL STOP SHAVING THEM. Yup- that's the consequence. And trust me... this is something we DO NOT want to happen. So pray for me and pray for Josh that these workouts are doing what they're supposed to!

~ Me!!

All I Do Is Eat!

BREAKFAST:
1 full egg
2 egg whites
1 cup of cheerio's
3/4 cup lowfat milk
1 fruit

And that my friends is JUST breakfast. I feel as if my life is CONSUMED with food, which is wierd right?! I mean I'm trying to lose weight and so I eat MORE than I'm used to??? Well, I guess that's the magic of it all. Apparently I wasn't eating enough, and when I DID eat is was all wrong. Now I'm not saying I was a pig ALL THE TIME, I tried to eat healthy for my kids and what not. But the kicker was I wasn't eating the right foods at the right time. Yup, that DOES make a huge difference.

I've had to learn to eat more carbs in the morning and more protien at night. Eat bigger meals in the morning and smaller meals in the evening. That's pretty simple addition there, how did I not know to do this? I think a lot of it is the conditioning. I wasn't conditioned to flip flop my meals. I used to eat bigger at night and less in the morning. I mean... that's the American norm.

Part of my struggle with this change for me was cutting out the goodies. Since I was 19 my nickname was cookie monster. I ADORE COOKIES! Mmmm. Just the thought is making my mouth salivate and my tongue hang out. In fact I'm panting at this very moment.

Okay- maybe not THAT bad. But still.

For real though, I went through serious sugar withdrawals at first. Later Dan told me that that is normal. I even got a little sick about two weeks in and was told that I was "de-toxing." I've heard that term before ... but now have a personal understanding as to what that means.

IT SUCKS. FLAT OUT SUCKS.

Now that I'm going into my sixth week it isn't quite as bad. I'm still nursing Shaylee so I do get funky, crazy peanut butter cravings. Dan added avocado to my meal plan because Shaylee started suffering from the lack of fat in my diet. And that actually helped a lot. BUT NOW... now my metabolism has spead up again! WOOT! WOOT! :) And so now I feel hungry all the time again. I'll have to talk to Dan about that and probably have my meal plan changed up again. I actually look forward to that... it's like trying out a new restaraunt every week. Well, a kind of crappy one anyway cause I can't cook worth BEANS!

~Nichole
ps. I CRAVE REESES PEANUT BUTTER CUPS RIGHT NOW!... I curse that company. HAHA!

Five Weeks In...

So yesterday was my official five-week way in. I felt pretty great about it because Tuesday Dan really worked me hard at the gym. In fact I could barely move for the two days that followed. It was funny because after the work out he had me cool down on the treadmill. At first he had me walk at 3.0 mph which is cake right? Well... it was until he explained that I walk incorrectly. Before I go more into this let me explain I've been having severe pain in my left hip. My mom had a complete hip replacement/ reconstruction surgery done several years back in her mid-forties. That's pretty young and so there is always a worry that genetics will be a problem for me as I age.

Anywho- back to the story at hand. He had me walking and then told me that I needed to walk with my toes pointed forward. So I did. Then he told me I needed to swing my hips. HA! And yes- that is exactly what I said when he told me to do that. In fact I also said, "What? You want me to walk around like a HUSSIE???" He found that HILARIOUS! So he slowed the speed down and there I go swinging my hips back and forth trying to keep my toes forward. Apparently I must walk more like a duck because THIS was HORRIBLE. You know what I looked like ... I looked like Gloria off of Madagascar when she's swinging her hips around dancing. I was swinging and shaking my booty and you know what!- I FELT THE JELLO IN MY PANTS DANCING WITH ME!

I stopped.

Dan then proceeded to explain that not only was I to do that there in the gym for the next five minutes, but that I was to do that EVERY day for thirty minutes... IN PUBLIC!

Say it aint so...

Well I have, and yes I blush and stop everytime some guy drives by. In my mind I can hear snickers and whistles but then I just laugh it off because seriously, who wants a ghetto hussie?

And then I remember where I live...

and go home.

*************************************

So laughs aside the workout at the gym actually was great. It taught me a lot. For example: I've been using 5 lb free weights at home and Dan taught me that I was to use 20 lb free weights. You know that roll in your back that gets pushed out and huge when wearing a bra? Well, pull over rows at 20 lbs. doing 3 reps of 10 solves this problem. WHO KNEW THAT A ROLL COULD BE SORE??? Josh literally had to get Shaylee in and out of her crib for me because I could hardly lift my arms.

*SIGH* Oh pain, wonderful pain!

So my stats:
(These will all be added up for the last 5 weeks since I'm starting my blog a month in.)

I've Lost:
1 in. off my neck
2.25 in. off my chest (yay!!!)
1 in. off my upper arm
.5 in. off my lower (fore) arm (I didn't/ don't have a lot of fat to lose here so this was exciting!)
2.25 in. off my upper waist
3 in. off my lower waist
2.25 in. off my hips/ butt
.5 in. off my thigh (I've actually gained most of my muscle in my legs!)
.25 off my calf

Techinically I've lost 18 lbs. of fat in the last 5 weeks and gained back 6 lbs of muscle. Leaving me at 12 lbs. off my total body weight.

Start: 269
As of yesterday(5/01): 257

Only 88 pounds to go!!!

ps. So I may have been off with my results to all my friends and family who have been with me the entire way... apparently I haven't been doing my math correctly. These stats are accurate however. :)

And So It Begins ...

My name is Nichole Gaertner and I have a long journey ahead of
me. I started out as an average every day girl who lived an average every day life. Of course I went through all the struggles a young teenage girl goes through, and yes that includes a slight eating disorder. Through out my life, however I have managed to go from starving myself to eating myself into a happy oblivion. Or so I thought at the time. Needless to say I started this "adventure" at 100 pounds over-weight.

If you've read my regular family blog, then you may already know what I am going to say (I promise I didn't copy and paste it ALL! LOL!) ... if not- then enjoy!

In the last five years of my life I have gone through many life- changing experiences, all of which left me emotionally vulnerable to a point. A long-term relationship of mine was ended dramatically, I met and married the love of my life in the six months that followed. My parent's moved to Idaho and I was all of a sudden in Ellensburg, alone with a husband that I still had to get to know. I started my junior year of college, my best friend's father died, I had a falling out with my best friend, got pregnant, had a baby, got pregnant again and had a miscarriage, reconciled with best friend, moved to Seattle, finally graduated CWU, and then had another baby. Talk about stress!!! HAHA! Needless to say I'm an emotional eater.

Now none of these life changes are so drastic, and in fact my life probably resembles that of many other young wives and mothers. I just didn't cope correctly. And that, my friends, is what this new found goal of mine is really all about so that someday I may be healthy enough to play with my distant-future grandchildren!

This blog is going to follow my struggles and achievments as I progress through this life altering change that I have decided to take on with full force. With the help of Dan Olsen as my personal trainer, and his wife Rachel as my work-out support system and confident I will hopefully end this blog at my goal weight of 169 pounds and 20% fat. I know this won't be an easy task, especially since I have had three pregnancies and two births in under two years ... but I just have to do it. My husband Josh and the rest of my family have all also decided to join me in making healthier life-style choices as well, which makes me feel blessed to have them all a part of my life.

I hope you follow along, and I hope you root for me as I make this change. I also hope you find the strength and enough encouragement to make yourself your own beautiful self as well.

The first step of this journey, though, is to recognize that no matter what- YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!

Love Nichole